Monday, 31 August 2015

Day One

I decided that I would record my journey of discovery, and as well as writing in on paper I thought I'd blog it as well. Totally high tech. It's also a record for myself, so I can see what happened, where I've been, and maybe work out where I'm going.

Big shout out to the BearCat combination that is helping me on my way!

I started on Sunday, with a very simple ritual meditation of sorts. My ritual, my way, using a spare candle.

Just as my mind was clearing, my muse spoke to me. At first I was a bit annoyed, although she was giving me some good advice for the CH project :) Then she started describing herself, which I did find interesting. (Posted below, for reference).

I asked for some space.
She obliged.

My question was simple. I asked for someone willing to guide me and give me strength. On further reflection though, I do wonder if my question was answered before I consciously asked it? I think, perhaps, it was. So I did some more thinking and reflecting. As much as I love (and sometimes hate) my muse, I don't know her name. But it is a step.


My one true and lonely love
Who has always been
She who first breathed life into me
And She whose name I shall speak with my final breath
She holds me close on nights when dreams are dark
Brings peace and shows such beauty in the world
And when She leaves me alone I stand
Cursing her name
Declaiming her sins
Until She returns in burst of light
And I have found my darkness again
She is my light and my dark
She is my illness and health
She is my joy and my sorrow

She is my muse

And then she kept me up a bit at night, until I wrote the next piece.

Who are you, my muse? 
Who speaks to me, in the caverns of my mind
When all else is still
A whisper in the night
A voice to break the quiet

Who are you, to me?
I know not your name or shape
Nothing of who you are
I know only your embrace
I have never seen your face

Do I need a name?
To put chains around your form
Cage you in bars formed of words
Or should I let you be
Knowing you care for me

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